Shortly after New Years’, one of my girlfriends and I were discussing resolutions. Mine is sort of a year-long goal (as any resolution should be), but it’s founded on the fact that in the late fall, I will no longer be a 20-something.
When I announced this to said girlfriend (a year or two younger than I), she gasped and then gushed out a line of sympathy (“I’m so sorry!”).
I think I actually laughed at her.
I am thrilled that I have this birthday coming up! I am excited to enter this big decade! My formal education is finished; my career is underway; I am carving out my adult life and finally am starting to figure things out! And, I have my own money to play with.
So why wouldn’t I look forward to 30?
Said girlfriend and I have always been on different pages. She is mildly bothered by the fact that she is not yet married, nor does she have kids at this point. I believe she thinks she is “getting old.”
I, on the other hand, have spent the last 10 years making sure I didn’t have any kids, and vetting out potential people to get married to. (Clearly none has succeeded).
Currently, I am reading the male version of 30 & single: Aaron Karo’s I’m Having More Fun Than You. Karo, the perennial bachelor, spells out exactly why it’s great for the 30-year old guy to not be married. This book isn’t for the feint of heart. But, I believe there is a flip side to this. I believe that there is a woman’s version. It would go something like this:
- I don’t have to check in with anybody; I can do chickflicks and sushi nights whenever I want
- I don’t have to fix breakfast, lunch, or dinner for anyone (heck, I have a hard enough time unwrapping the protein bar for myself in the mornings)
- I can continue kicking a** at my career and not feel guilty that I should be home ironing shirts or vacuuming
- I can spend my money on frivolous things like shoes, purses, and vintage jewelry (or go “hog wild” at Victoria’s Secret) without receiving the evil eye
Sure, I hear the inherent selfishness in all of this. And frankly, I’m okay with this. I have worked hard to get to this point in my life, and I am letting myself enjoy it.
When the time is right, and the right man comes along, then this story will change. (Or, will it?)
But until then, this whole year is going to be a big party leading up to a fantastic birthday! It’s time for my single, fabulous, women friends to embrace this notion! Why not love the life you have now instead of pining for something you don’t? It may not be as good!