So the residual in my life and I, once again, got into a bit of a tiff. I wanted to *know* where we stood so I could proceed accordingly. I wanted to know if his nightly calling, invitations to have dinner, and conversations beginning with “Hey Beautiful” meant he wanted to start dating again. I wanted a label.
He questioned why I couldn’t just let things happen. Why did I have to over-think everything? [Memo to Residual: I am in law school… this is what we do here]. Oddly enough, my dad has accused me of over-think recently, too.
But back to Residual. He then challenged the label. Residual asked, “what if a year from now we have a really amazing dinner one night… what does the label do then? What if the spark is still there?” A year from now is a different place and a different time. Labels can be revisited and amended as need be–they aren’t permanent.
Regardless, I explained that I needed to know. Because the flirting thing just wasn’t going to work between us unless there was something behind it. Residual said that he flirts with all his female friends… it’s just how he is. I politely told him, in no uncertain terms, that that wasn’t going to fly with me.
Because really… what is the difference then between a friend and a girlfriend at that point? Is there a line? If so, when you flirt with that line, do you mean to cross it?
Call me old fashioned, but I like to keep my friends and my boyfriends in two distinct places in my life. The friends get the best girl buddy side of me. My boyfriends get the buddy, but they also then get the flirty, sensual side of me too. And is this so bad … to keep apples and oranges separated?
Either way, I still want the label.